The meaning of life

 

I was reading one of my favourite blogs today and came across this quote (see original post here). It resonated with me all the way to my core. How true is it that we spend our lives wanting bigger and better things, more of this, fancier that. While managing to ignore or get annoyed at the most amazing simple little things in life. How many times do I brush off the kids because I'm busy right now? How often do I sit on the couch (or the floor) instead of being out enjoying the wonderful sunshine on bare feet before it goes and hides for the winter?
I guess the message today is simple. Take stock, what do you reaaaaallly want to be doing right now? Maybe you should just get up and do it. Sit and play with your kids, walk or sit in the sunshine, visit a friend, read a book just because you want to. Enjoy the week that is coming, find the good bits that are happening around you and relish in them. Live in the now, it really is all we have.

Dealing with morning sickness - 23 natural ways to fight the nausea.

Morning sickness during pregnancy is largely caused by hormonal changes, however vitamin deficiency, low blood sugar, strong smells, foul odours, lack of exercise, fatigue, stress, constipation, anxiety and worry all add to it as well. Feeling sick is more common with your first pregnancy, if it’s a girl, or if you're carrying multiple babies. It usually turns up at around 6 weeks and lasts until around 12-14 weeks for most people, although some have it start earlier and feel sick right through to labour.

 

Some of the remedies below will help immediately, others help work on possible underlying causes. If you really can't keep food down see your doctor, some mothers get a condition called Hyperemesis Gravidarum and need to be hospitalised and given IV fluids to re-hydrate.
 

1. Increase B-complex vitamins and iron intake. Vitamin B-6, taken as 25 mg every 8 hours, has been shown to have a significant effect in reducing or stopping nausea and vomiting.

2. Take zinc supplements, 25 mg per day

 

3. Sip on some raspberry leaf, peppermint, or anise tea.

4. Massage your belly with Iti Baby's Mummy Morning Oil - the fresh scent of peppermint and Orange can help quell the nausea.

5. GINGER - Cut or grate some ginger root and pour hot water over it, then drink as a tea. or take ginger root in capsule form. Drink flat, room temperature ginger beer or ginger ale. Chew on crystallised ginger. Eat some ginger chews.

6. Take homoeopathic tablets: Nux vomica 6X or ipecac 30x.

7. Eat a protein-rich snack, especially right before bed.

8. Go for a walk or enjoy some mild exercise to relieve hormonal activity.

9. Keep a box of crackers by your bed and eat a few before getting out of bed in the morning.

10. Avoid spicy, fried, rich, fatty, and greasy foods. Also avoid any caffeine or artificial sweeteners.

 

11. Get outside and get plenty of fresh air and sunshine.

12. Suck on 1 drop of peppermint oil on a sugar cube. (Or drop the entire sugar/oil concoction into your tea.)

 

13. Wear motion sickness wrist bands like these.

14. Get some Rescue Remedy. 

15. Eat 5 to 6 small, frequent meals every few hours throughout the day. Make sure to have a balance of carbohydrates and protein to maintain blood sugar. Try not to eat too much at a time, but also avoid an empty stomach. 

16. Suck on lemon drops.

17. Drink brewer's yeast and tomato juice with lemon.

18. NAP! Being over tired makes morning sickness worse.

19. Drink ice cold lemonade.

20. Get acupuncture or acupressure treatments.

21. Chew on fennel seeds.

22. Stay hydrated. If water won't stay down, try frozen natural juice Popsicles, frozen grapes or simple ice chips.

23. Avoid anything that could potentially raise your oestrogen higher - reusing plastic drink bottles, using plastic in the microwave, farmed fish or any animal fed soy products, Soy products.

If you are finding the nausea overwhelming talk with your health care professional, there are some antiemetics that are considered safe during pregnancy if they are really required.

 

6 Chemicals to avoid putting on your baby

Choosing baby skin care products isn't as easy as it appears. If you think just grabbing the popular products off the shelves is a good idea, or even splashing out on something labelled organic is the way to go, then you have some reading to do! Unfortunately as much as the packaging may be super cute and the advertising very convincing, you cannot just trust what a company says at face value. They do however legally have to tell you what is in the products you are buying. To make products cheaper and cheaper, companies now use all sorts of chemicals that you don't find in nature. Some of these are totally harmless, others unfortunately are not.

 

To be labelled "organic" a products does not even have to have 100% organic ingredients! Your skin is your largest organ, and it absorbs many things straight into the blood stream. This is helpful for trans-dermal pain/nausea relief in the medical world, but it is scary considering how much we put on our skin in our daily lives. Safe baby products are even more important than adult products as a baby's skin is much more fragile, sensitive and thin, meaning they absorb more through their skin and react more strongly to chemicals.

A lot of conventional baby products that are marketed for sensitive skin contain ingredients that will cause irritations, rashes, teary eyes, rashes and more. All things you would never wish upon your new bundle of love.

What can you do? While you may not be able to avoid all the chemicals around, here are 6 that are worth avoiding. Read your ingredients lists, and avoid products with these chemicals.

 

1. Synthetic Colours

By definition, synthetic colours are made up from petrochemicals and Coal tar. These are too often a major contributor to many skin irritations, synthetic colours used to supposedly make a cosmetic “pretty” should be avoided at all costs, along with hair dyes. They will be labelled as FD&C or D&C, followed by a colour and a number.

Some products may use natural methods of creating a colour but more often than not, the colour in baby bathes, washes and lotions is achieved by adding synthetic colour's.
 

 2. Mineral Oil

By definition, mineral oil is a distillation product, a by product of petroleum. It is used as a moisturiser, lubricant and laxative. Many companies use this product because of the low cost. Involved in mineral oil’s production is sulphuric acid, absorbents, solvents, and alkali's which is not exactly what I’d want to put on my baby’s skin!

It acts as a coating, basically suffocating your skin (think: having plastic wrap coated on your body) and, if there are any beneficial ingredients in the product, mineral oil will not allow them to absorb.

3. Propylene Glycol

By definition, propylene glycol is a liquid alcohol used as a solvent, in anti freeze, and in the food, plastic and perfume agencies. Meaning, if products have the word “fragrance” in it, there is a large chance that propylene glycol is included. In baby products, you can find propylene glycol in baby wipes and you may even find them in ointments, shampoos/conditioners, etc.

Propylene glycol may not have such high concentrations that it could seriously hurt your baby, but the fact that it does have irritating, allergenic properties should be enough to keep it away from your baby’s gentle, sensitive skin.

4. Parabens & Other Preservatives

By definition, a paraben is any of a group of compounds used as preservatives in pharmaceutical and cosmetic products and in the food industry. The whole reasoning behind using parabens is to prohibit the growth of any kind of microbe in cosmetic and personal care products. Parabens are found primarily any products that contain significant amounts of water, as water can encourage the growth of microbes. Parabens can be found as any of the following ingredients: Ethylparaben, butylparaben, methylparaben, propylparaben, other ingredients ending in –paraben.

The biggest concern with parabens is they are known to disrupt hormone function, an effect that is linked to increased risk of breast cancer and reproductive toxicity. Parabens have even been found in biopsies from breast tumours. There have been no studies confirming the safety of paraben preservatives for babies.

 

5. Fragrance

 

By definition, a fragrance is a pleasant, sweet smell. The word fragrance is a trade secret, which means they are not required to disclose fragrance is. There can be up to 12,500 separate ingredients that make up the word fragrance, so that vanilla smell may be a concoction of who knows what.

Baby products are no different! It seems many companies put all sorts of “sweet” smelly ingredients to make mama’s feel all warm inside, which makes the product sell better. The bottom line is this, most synthetic fragrances are an irritant. It’s best to stick to unscented or products that use natural essential oils as the fragrance.

6. Triethanolamine (TEA)

 

By definition, triethanolamine is an alkaline substance used as a surfactant and pH adjusting chemical. Surfactants are compounds that lower the surface tension between two liquids or between a liquid and a solid.

The concern with TEA is that it may be linked to organ system toxicity or infertility and can be irritating to the skin. TEA — and it’s cousin’s DEA and MEA — can be found in a range of baby lotions and creams.

What Products Could You Use Instead?

Have a read of the ingredients list on what you buy, if you can't pronounce it, its probably not natural and unprocessed. Find a brand that uses natural ingredients, the more simple the list, usually the better. Iti Baby proudly makes all natural baby care products.

 

 

A Gluten-Free lunchbox

There are many reasons why you might be trying a gluten free diet for your children - skin allergies, behavioural issues, stomach problems, or you might be like me and just think we eat far too much modern wheat in our diet and that we all have some degree of intolerance to it. My eldest was only two when she started to complain of a sore belly after eating wheat products, we live largely gluten free these days, though we aren't too strict on it.

We don't buy gluten free bread for the kids, it is gross. We have learnt to live without bread. The girls have cereal, porridge or eggs for breakfast. For lunch they have a selection of things - carrot sticks, cherry tomato's, strawberries, raspberries, easy-yo yogurt, jelly, salami, ham, sticks of cheese, olives (a favourite!), nuts, boiled egg, cold meat from the night before, raw broccoli, raw cauliflower, fruit, and of course home made baking.

I was doing some lunchbox baking with the kids on Saturday and thought I would share two of the best gluten free recipes I have with you all :-) I think the sign of a good gluten free product is when my best friend doesn't believe me that they are gluten free, if they pass that test, they are good!

Dana's Gluten free baking mix:
 

2 c rice flour (the finer the better, try an Asian supermarket)

1 ½ c maize cornflour
1 c tapioca or arrowroot flour (they are practically the same)
1 ½ t gum – either xanthan or guar gum (you can buy at the health food shop or the supermarket or in bulk from www.kiwisoapsupplies.co.nz)

3 t baking powder

Mix well. This works out about half the price of buying the pre-mixed stuff and works just as well.

 

Dana's Gluten Free Chocolate Chippies
 

 

Cream together:

• 220g softened butter
• 1/2c brown sugar
• 6T sweetened condensed milk (about 1/2 a can)
• 2t Vanilla essence

Mix in:

• 2C of baking mix
• 2tsp of baking powder and
• 400g chocolate drops or buttons.

This mixture is surprisingly soft, don't stress. Put golf ball sized blobs on a lined tray and bake at 180 degrees for 13-14 minutes. Leave to cool on the tray for a few minutes before transferring to a cooling rack.

Best Chocolate cake recipe ever:

No one will believe it is gluten free!

 

Mix in a bowl:

• 2c baking mix
• 2c sugar
• 1t baking soda
• 1t baking powder
• 1/2t salt

In a pot bring to the boil then turn off:

• 250g butter
• 1c water
• 1/2c cocoa

Mix the cocoa mixture into dry ingredients, then add:

• 2 eggs
• ½ c milk
• 1 1/2t vanilla

Beat together well either by hand or with a mixer.
Bake 180 deg in 25cm tin for 60-70 min or until a skewer comes out clean. We ice this with a simple chocolate icing - 2T butter, 2T cocoa, 2C icing sugar and hot water to mix.

Gluten free baking tips:

Most recipes with lots of butter or eggs works well with gluten free baking. If you are making a cake with 'bits' in it – banana cake, carrot cake, sultana cake you need to add another teaspoon of gum powder to the recipe to hold it together. Some recipes work best if you add an additional egg or more butter – eg scones you add an extra 25g butter. Always just under bake cakes/slices and muffins, and watch cakes closely. I usually under bake cookies by 2 -4 minutes. If they are cooked for the full amount of time they end up dry and crumbly. Hunt around to find the cheapest flours, the Asian food markets often have rice flour much cheaper than the super market, and buying some stuff on line is sometimes cheaper too. Good luck with your endeavours and if you have a favourite gluten free recipe or any questions, feel free to comment below!

 

 

Life Lessons to teach my Kids

Tips to make housework less of a chore

 

Getting housework done can seem totally impossible now that you have a baby. While the first 12 weeks of new parent hood is probably the most challenging time of your life, living in a chaotic living space at the same time will make it much more difficult to cope! Here are some little tips to help you contain the mess.

1) Pre-baby Spring clean

Before baby arrives, use your nesting energy to have a big clean out. A clutter free home is MUCH easier to keep tidy.

2) Invest in some storage

Large clear plastic tubs with lids are invaluable in sorting excess toys, clothes that are too big and too small (for both mum and baby!).  Before you buy them, measure your storage cupboard to make sure they fit! Use a marker pen to label them clearly.

3) Use your networks

If a friend or family member says "just let me know what I can do to help" they actually mean it. So ask! A simple "Actually would you please turn the washing on for me?" or "Could you please watch the baby for 10 minutes while I put the washing out" is all you need to say. Mothers, sisters and best mates are probably the easiest to ask without feeling like you are a pest.

4) Get your older kids to help

Even a toddler can help do some simple dusting, or run their toys to their room. Try to make tidying a race or a game with afternoon tea as a prize at the end. Encourage your kids to put away one game before they start with another.

5) Use a baby carrier

A sling, or Moby wrap or a front pack are wonderful when you need to get a few things done but baby needs mummy time. This is great for vacuuming, getting groceries or folding washing. Some skilled mamma's even manage to feed while baby hangs out in a sling.
Tip: Avoid spraying nasty chemicals or hanging upside down while baby is being carried.

6) Don't waste your time

Instead of constantly tiding and going backwards and forwards all day, use a washing basket or similar and put things that need to go away into it. Then at the end of the day carry it room to room putting away things (or better yet, get someone else to do it!).
When folding washing take a little more time to have a pile for each drawer for each person, this makes putting away so much easier.

7) Get things done as you can

There's no rule that says you have to clean your house all one one day, all before lunch. Complete a few cleaning tasks each day to get housework done while still leaving you plenty of time for bonding with your newborn. For example: make Monday fold washing day, vacuum on Wednesday, shop on Thursday etc, this allows you to ignore it until then, knowing you have a time set aside for it.

8) Use the noise of the vacuum to help baby sleep.

Secure your newborn into a bouncer seat or bassinet and let the sounds of the vacuum send him off to sleep, Hopefully he'll get a good rest while within eyesight while you accomplish some household chores!

9) Spray and walk away
Spray your kitchen and bathroom down with white vingar and leave it for a while, when you go back the grime will have broken down and a simple wipe with a microfibre cloth and you are done!

10) Employ a cleaner

For busy mums who aren't comfortable accepting help from friends and family, consider hiring help. Paying a cleaning service to take care of household chores will let you focus on bonding with your newborn without the guilt of letting friends and family pitch in when there are chores to do.

At the end of the day, people come to see you (and baby) not your house, and most of us live day-to-day in more mess than we would like you to know. So RELAX and spend some time on you and baby, after all no one ever wishes they had spend more time cleaning and less time with their baby!

Real Advice for New Parents

Becoming a parent for the first time is exciting. It is also quite scarey. Some of the stories people kindly share would terrify even the bravest of souls. But there is no love without pain, and no win without sacrifice and every single parent I know, given the choice, would do it all again in a heartbeat. The little people that we love so unconditionally are very very much worth it!

Here is some advice from those that have been there and done that:

Said by a wise not-quite-old man (my Dad)

Be realistic

 

Children WILL change your life. You may think right now that nothing much will change. It will defiantly change, significantly. You can lug them around in a capsule to all your social engagements for a while, but this won't work forever. But it is good change, embrace it.

Your life for the next two years (per child) will feel similar to a constant hangover. Don't worry, go with it, even try to enjoy it - it will get better. Try to enjoy that 2am (and 3am and 4am...) snuggle, there will come a time when you kinda wish you still got them.

 

"Don't sweat any of it. The small stuff or the big stuff. Humans have been raising babies for hundreds of thousands of years. No matter what people tell you, there is no one best way to do it. An abundance of love, gentleness and care (for yourselves and for baby) will see you right." - Stacey Wilson mum of 3

 

 

As long as both you and your little ones are in clean-ish clothes (seriously unless they have covered head to toe in spaghetti sauce, a little  juice on their front is no worries), they are fed (always keep snacks on hand - fruit, jelly, yogurt, cheese), happy and healthy you are doing great as a parent.

 

Practical tips

Buy a truckload of facecloths - they are invaluable at cleaning pretty much anything off of everything.

When getting bibs, get good quality thick ones, preferably with domes rather than valcro. Valcro wreaks havoc in the washing machine.

If you use cloth nappies, always do the valcro up before washing them! (see above)

Holding a child throwing a tantrum is much easier side on (yes, yours will do it too, probably in a busy supermarket, when you are in a hurry to get home), you wear less kicks to the groin and they can't hit you in the face so easily. This also works carrying a screamer who won't hold your hand across the road.

Buy a drop-sided cot for your first child so that you can still reach in to get them out when you are pregnant with the next (assuming having the first hasn't put you off).

Keep a box of tissues handy in every room to mop up nasty spillages.

Keep all your nappy creams well out of the reach of toddlers at all times. Sudo-cream and carpet DO NOT MIX.

Do it your way

"You will know a multitude of great parents who give you heaps of great advice and suggestions. ....and it will all conflict with each other. They are still great parents and so will you be. Your baby will grow up - they will not remember whether you breast fed or bottle, used disposables or cloth, fed to sleep or self settled- they will remember you love them and cared for them- always have and always will." - Letitia McRodden mum of 2

You will be on the receiving end of all kinds of advice, the best idea is to smile sweetly, nod politely and go and do things exactly how you want to. Mum knows best. Unfortunately this may include conflicting advice from health professionals. Usually this just means there are several options that will work, pick one and stick at it for a while.

If your baby will only sleep on you, or with you or be rocked or fed to sleep. THAT'S OK! most of us do this anyway, we just don't tell everyone because it is seen as the wrong thing to do. I don't know why we hide it, it's instinctive and it is what most indigenous cultures have done for thousands of years, but now some  researcher says we shouldn't and it is now seen as being the worst thing to do.

If you bed share, learn to do it safely and drop the guilt.

If you bottle feed, learn to do it safely and drop the guilt.

If you have to leave your baby to scream in the cot, so you can go outside and calm down for a few minutes so you don't shake the living daylights out of it because you haven't slept at all for 48 hours and it is still not asleep, do it safely and drop the guilt.

Also remember you can ring the Plunket helpline! 0800 933 922 for pretty much anything.

 

Doctors, nurses and others don't know everything. They are human too, you know your baby the best, if you think something is wrong and no one is listening to you, keep asking, keep getting others to look until you are satisfied. Follow your instincts, you have them for a reason :-)

Wise words

Love them a lot. Say it often.

Enjoy all the snuggles and cuddles you can get.

Keep a book or box of special things, their first hat, or shoes, funny things they say and do, you will forget them.

Let them climb things, jump off things and generally play. Let them get dirty and don't sterilise everything around them. Generally kids know their own limits and won't do what they can't do. Some germs are good to grow a strong immune system.

No one on their death bed ever said "I wish I spent more time in the office" - don't regret placing your children above your career.

Set strong boundaries when it comes to expected behaviour, manners, responsibility and safety. Then let them play within these bounds. Try not to say no too often.

Kids are all gifted, some just take a little longer to unwrap it! Don't rush them and don't compare, they will get there in the end. If you are genuinely concerned, check with your doctor.

Get your first aid certificate in infant and child CPR, heaven hopes you never have to use it, but the 10-20 minutes it takes an ambulance to get there may be too late for a fragile little life. Arm yourself with some knowledge and skills and don't be afraid to use them!

 

If anyone offers you a cooked meal, folded washing or ironing, or babysitting so you can have a nap - Never say no.

In the first few months try and get outside everyday, even if it is just to the letterbox or around the block. Fresh air and sunshine can do wonders for altering your perspective and helping your outlook.

 

Never underestimate the power of sleep deprivation. It can turn the most pleasant of persons into a raging crazy-person.

If you feel yourself slipping, and unable to cope -  please, please don't try and go it alone. Ask for help. Ask your partner, siblings, parents, friends, neighbour, health visitor or Plunket line. Ask anyone that will listen. Parenting can be hard, and it mostly works out in the wash. But get some support if you need it, we all want to see you succeed!