I have heard a lot of new parents struggling with babies with 'colic' in the last few weeks. I thought it was about time for a colic blog post.
Both my babies had classic colic, and the second one had silent reflux as well. NOT A FUN TIME!
Colic is defined as: Unexplained crying for 3 or more hours a day, for 3 or more days a week, for 3 or more weeks.
What this really means is life is miserable! There is no known cause (though there are A LOT of theories) and there is no real treatment available. Colic typically starts around 3 weeks of age and seems to be gone again by 14 weeks. Leaving the longest 11 weeks of your life in the middle.
It is often assumed that colicky babies are in some kind of pain, as they are not relieved by the comforts of feeding and holding, often writhe and grunt, may start and stop their screaming very abruptly, and have a shrill cry that resembles the sound they make when they are in pain, they are often said to 'pull up' their legs while crying.
One of the
compelling reasons why colic is NOT something parents have to put up
with or accept is that in a number of cultures, colic is virtually
absent.
What causes colic?
Over
the years many explanations have been put forward about the cause of
colic. Common explanations have included that colic is caused by wind,
by maternal anxiety, by tummy troubles, by a baby’s sensitive
temperament, or by a baby’s immature brain. The ideas of stomach migraines and early food allergies have also been thrown around. While there is an element of
truth in all of these explanations, none of them fully explain colicky
behaviour, or point to what we can do to calm a colicky baby.
The
true cause of colic is what is now often referred to as a missing '4th
trimester'. Human babies (as opposed to other animals) are born before
their brains are fully developed, and before they are fully ready for
the world.
Inside the womb, a baby is very tightly bundled, she is constantly fed, she is exposed to 80-90 decibels of ‘white noise’ 24/7, and she constantly swings and jiggles about inside a sea of amniotic fluid. These are the conditions that calm a baby in the womb, and unless we make a concerted effort to replicate these conditions once a baby is born, their absence will be a cause of considerable distress to a newborn.
Many other cultures will carry a tightly swaddled baby in a sling carrier the whole day, and co-sleep at night. These babies are breastfed as soon as they become unsettled and are not expected to self-sooth or go with out their mother for the first 3 or more months.
Interestingly these cultures also do not experience colic in the way the western culture does.
Your baby wants to be held, she will sleep in your arms or on your chest but not in her bed, she will wake as soon as you put her down. It is a survival instinct, they are too young to sleep alone naturally. They need your warmth and comfort, all the tricks in the book are really trying to replicate you, why don't we as a society accept that maybe baby just needs some parent time?
If you think of the times
of day your baby gets upset and try and re-look at your routine at this
time of day. It is often tea time - other children are tired and hungry
and need their dinner/bath/bedtime routines too, so baby gets handed to
someone else or left to their own devices while mum gets dinner ready.
Some suggestions:
-
Pre-prepare dinner/meals when baby is settled
-
Enlist some help at tea time - Dad, Nana, Aunty, an older sibling or a DVD (shock horror)
- Put baby tightly swaddled in a bouncer or pushchair by the dinner table and keep baby moving with your feet while you eat.
- Sling or wrap style carriers are great - pop baby in and have two hands free to continue with what you were trying to do.
-
Use a pacifier to help soothe baby
- Some babies find a deep, warm bath relaxing.
-
If baby is unsettled it will do no harm to future sleep patterns if you
spend the evening with baby napping on your chest in the lounge while
you read or watch TV. In fact you will both be more relaxed and baby will
probably get more sleep then trying to settle them alone in their own
bed.
-
If you choose to co-sleep it is recommended that you do so by using a
'side car' style bed - where baby has their own space.
Warning:
Bed Sharing /co-sleeping should not be undertaken by people who smoke,
have been drinking alcohol or are under the influence of drugs, these
things greatly increase the risk of SIDS (cot death). Do not co-sleep on
a couch or lounger chair.
I hope this is helpful for those out there struggling. It's not an easy time, but it does pass (like most things with babies). If you are really struggling with your crying baby, put them down somewhere safe and have a break, call for back up if need be. Kia kaha.